... this article is almost Onion newsworthy.
It includes some great quotes by Secretary of State Clinton:
"Apparently, the lifeboat has run out of gas;" and "The world must come together to end the scourge of piracy."
Another article contains this helpful piece of advice:
"Action to evade pirates usually consists of steaming the ship under attack at full speed, making quick and unpredictable course changes, and blasting the ship's fire hoses at points on the hull where the pirates might try to throw grappling hooks and ladders."
Just in case you're ever being chased by pirates.
And this article reports officially that "the pirates were in a 'very, very tight spot,'" according to "piracy expert Roger Middleton of the London based think tank Chatham house." (What? A piracy expert from a London based think tank??? And that's the best he could come up with????)